Friday, April 15, 2016

M is for Monkey

I mentioned earlier that I am not a great fan of horses.  Ok, there is one animal I don't like.
Monkeys.  They are creepy, nasty, things that spook the **** out of me.

Auntie had a monkey.  Why, I don't know, but she kept it in a cage in the kitchen.  I really didn't think much about it, until one time I walked in, and for some reason, the little demon was angry with me.  I started to go to the table, when something flew past my face.  I jumped back, looked, and realized there was a turd stuck to the wall.  That was followed by another, and screeching that wouldn't be out of place in a horror movie.  I grabbed what I needed on the table, and ran out, while poo missiles were zinging around me.

I didn't go back into the kitchen...

I think Auntie finally got rid of the monkey.  I don't know if it died, she sold it, gave it away, what.  But I think the little monster probably would still be flinging poo, if it were still around...

I wish I could say that my opinion has eased over the years, but no.  I hope that they are happy and free in the jungles or where ever they are supposed to naturally be, (especially the ones that hot tub when it snows), but pets?  Not for me...  (shudder!)


  1. Auntie kept it in a cage that fit in her kitchen? Poor thing. Monkeys are quite intelligent, the flinging was most likely his way of protesting his conditions. No, I don't think they're all that cute either. Wouldn't want one.

  2. I think you're referring to those snow monkeys in Japan. I'm not all that fond of them either and I don't think people should have them as pets.

  3. They are not good pets, although i do like watching them in their natural habitat.

  4. I don't like the idea of caging intelligent animals as pets. I'm sure that poor monkey was miserable. And consequently passed the misery along...

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  5. This is hilarious. Poo missiles. The monkey could run for president. It could probably win a debate against Mighty Mouth (Donald Trump) just on the basis of those poo missiles.


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