I don't know what it is about having an illness, small or large, that just takes it out of you. Well, I know what is happening, the body resisting illness and such. But it's the idea that I can be well and healthy, going gangbusters on the machine once EVERY OTHER DAY, (she can be taught!), and getting stronger, then, like a wet blanket dropped from above, a cold. Or worse, in some cases. But whatever, it knocks you down.
I just fell flat as far as doing ANYTHING when I was ill. And all I had was a cold, but I was just as happy, relatively speaking, to sit and stare at the cows outside, as to actually get up and DO something. I mean, I had one day, that I didn't even want to knit! And anyone that knows me, that's pretty off the charts!
Tuesday, I got up early, and tried to work on my machine. Well, I *did* manage to work out for about 15 minutes, but am not as greatly recovered as I hoped. I started slow, and worked up, then started coughing. Yay. Okay, well, I can walk, so we do that. And I managed to get something done, so I feel like it was good.
I had a friend who had cancer, she went through so much, and I remember there were a few times I would talk with her, and she was quite happy to just sit, and let me babble on. She was so worn out from what she had to go through, even with her up attitude, and good doctors and such, she just had a battle and a half to stay stable.
So am I odd to think that I should be happy it was only a cold, and that I will recover quickly???
Showing posts with label breast cancer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breast cancer. Show all posts
Saturday, February 22, 2020
Tuesday, April 23, 2019
Memorial.
A friend of mine died unexpectedly from a car wreck. I had been moping about it for a while. Husband had actually known her and her husband longer than I had. We went to her memorial, and I just watched for a little while.
This was a gal that was exuberant, and was happy. She had had breast cancer, and so when she wore something to keep warm, as she'd lost her hair?
Jester caps!
A hat that looked like R2D2!
One that looked like she had a TARDIS on her head...
You get the idea. In fact, at her memorial where she worked, (there was two, one for people from work, one for family and close friends), all of her hats were table toppers.
Bright colors were generally the norm, if she wasn't wearing something related to Doctor Who. She and I would have discussions on that show, as well as Star Trek, and various books. She kept chiding me to update, as I haven't seen much of any of them since the Doctor's 6th regeneration. (Matt Smith seemed to be her favorite. Didn't get a chance to ask what she thought of Jodie Whittaker.) I knitted her a Tom Baker Doctor Who scarf. We amused a few people at the Ren Faire, when we both were wearing them (I made myself one), at the same time.
Anywho, back to my observation.
I realized that she had friends all across the spectrum. I have been to memorials where there are mostly older people, or younger people. Mostly men that knew the deceased, or in one case, mostly knitters.
But her memorial, there were young folks, there were some older (I hesitate to say elderly, but they had seen several more winters than I have... Ahem.) Some that I know are conservative, others radically liberal, some who were neither. Some that smoked and drank and partied, some that didn't. She was friends with, and happy about all.
And it came through when we were together.
She had a unique habit of going to the liquor store to pick up something for a drink she was making, and she would pick up a bottle of something else, not because she was going to drink it, necessarily, but, it was a pretty color. Or the label was neat. The color of the booze was interesting... So there was a long table of that, too. He asked everyone to feel free to take that, as well.
I looked, but I don't drink. Then I spotted it. A green bottle shaped like a cat. I double checked, yep, take it. I did.
Someone, knowing I don't drink, asked what it was. I had to read it to them, it seems to be some sort of wine. I didn't take it for the contents, however. Several folks did, and some were... very happy and relaxed, by the time they left. (There was a check on who was the designated driver, too...)
There was a couple boxes sitting, and her Husband said that he'd like everyone to pick out a hat for themselves. I looked at the hats. One was a narrow jester hat with bells on. I tried it on, and it was just a bit too tight, but I decided to keep it, as I remembered hearing her walk into camp more than once wearing it. She always commented she could tell when I was walking into her camp, as I have a set of bells I wear, and she said they were distinctive, she could tell mine from all the other bell wearing types at faire. (Which is saying something at a Ren Faire, trust me!!!) But the hat was uncomfortable. So I took it off, and put my regular, wide brimmed hat back on.
Someone noticed her "horn top" hat. I truly don't know what else to call it. It's a round black cap, with a long black beaver tail flap behind, and the whole thing is covered in bright colored fabric horns. It looks like someone skinned a prehistoric party animal! I mentioned that I'd already taken a hat, and the daughter said no, it's fine, I bet it will fit you. I "hmmmd" a bit, then stuck it on over my other hat.
It fit perfectly! I remember my friend wearing that one a lot, it was one of her favorites. And I thanked the daughter, and wore it the rest of the gathering. Someone in the group mentioned that I looked a lot like her, wearing it.
I think my friend might have been looking down, cracking up at me.
At least I hope so... :)
This was a gal that was exuberant, and was happy. She had had breast cancer, and so when she wore something to keep warm, as she'd lost her hair?
Jester caps!
A hat that looked like R2D2!
One that looked like she had a TARDIS on her head...
You get the idea. In fact, at her memorial where she worked, (there was two, one for people from work, one for family and close friends), all of her hats were table toppers.
Bright colors were generally the norm, if she wasn't wearing something related to Doctor Who. She and I would have discussions on that show, as well as Star Trek, and various books. She kept chiding me to update, as I haven't seen much of any of them since the Doctor's 6th regeneration. (Matt Smith seemed to be her favorite. Didn't get a chance to ask what she thought of Jodie Whittaker.) I knitted her a Tom Baker Doctor Who scarf. We amused a few people at the Ren Faire, when we both were wearing them (I made myself one), at the same time.
Anywho, back to my observation.
I realized that she had friends all across the spectrum. I have been to memorials where there are mostly older people, or younger people. Mostly men that knew the deceased, or in one case, mostly knitters.
But her memorial, there were young folks, there were some older (I hesitate to say elderly, but they had seen several more winters than I have... Ahem.) Some that I know are conservative, others radically liberal, some who were neither. Some that smoked and drank and partied, some that didn't. She was friends with, and happy about all.
And it came through when we were together.
She had a unique habit of going to the liquor store to pick up something for a drink she was making, and she would pick up a bottle of something else, not because she was going to drink it, necessarily, but, it was a pretty color. Or the label was neat. The color of the booze was interesting... So there was a long table of that, too. He asked everyone to feel free to take that, as well.
I looked, but I don't drink. Then I spotted it. A green bottle shaped like a cat. I double checked, yep, take it. I did.
Someone, knowing I don't drink, asked what it was. I had to read it to them, it seems to be some sort of wine. I didn't take it for the contents, however. Several folks did, and some were... very happy and relaxed, by the time they left. (There was a check on who was the designated driver, too...)
There was a couple boxes sitting, and her Husband said that he'd like everyone to pick out a hat for themselves. I looked at the hats. One was a narrow jester hat with bells on. I tried it on, and it was just a bit too tight, but I decided to keep it, as I remembered hearing her walk into camp more than once wearing it. She always commented she could tell when I was walking into her camp, as I have a set of bells I wear, and she said they were distinctive, she could tell mine from all the other bell wearing types at faire. (Which is saying something at a Ren Faire, trust me!!!) But the hat was uncomfortable. So I took it off, and put my regular, wide brimmed hat back on.
Someone noticed her "horn top" hat. I truly don't know what else to call it. It's a round black cap, with a long black beaver tail flap behind, and the whole thing is covered in bright colored fabric horns. It looks like someone skinned a prehistoric party animal! I mentioned that I'd already taken a hat, and the daughter said no, it's fine, I bet it will fit you. I "hmmmd" a bit, then stuck it on over my other hat.
It fit perfectly! I remember my friend wearing that one a lot, it was one of her favorites. And I thanked the daughter, and wore it the rest of the gathering. Someone in the group mentioned that I looked a lot like her, wearing it.
I think my friend might have been looking down, cracking up at me.
At least I hope so... :)
Friday, October 07, 2011
A Breast Cancer Awareness Post. Please don't laugh. Or do... (blush)
Have to get back in the habit of blogging again! Ok, for quick here, I have been making applesauce, zucchini bread with apples, I cleaned out our freezer as I had run out of room, I have picked apples to make MORE applesauce, or some such. And I just checked the garden, it needs to be picked over and cleaned out.
Did I hear glutton for punishment?
Yes. What, may I ask, is your point? (grin)
So. I realized it was October, which is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I decided to share a story about it.
It's a story with a happy ending! Really!!
I was in my first year of college where I was out "on my own", in my little apartment, doing my college-y things, and one thing I wanted to do was take karate. There is a family story that when I was a toddler sized carpet rodent, I had used some karate skills, taught to me by my babysitter, to kick another kid off the stage when my Dad was being installed as Sargent of Arms in a lodge meeting.
I guess I never got over it, because I still like karate. Thusly, I wander into my class, and start with running. Lots and lots of running. (And I was given the nickname Duck by one of the others, as I have feet as flat as flat can be, and it sounded like I was slapping the floor, not running...) After what seemed like MILES of running, we would then go on to practice punches. Over and over, and over, and over again, with the teacher pausing by certain students to correct arm placement or stance. After all this we'd usually actually get to spar a bit. (I usually managed to get put with someone who was several belts ahead and at least 10 inches taller than me. But it was fun. Most of the time.)
So, this went on for about 2 months, and I thought nothing of it. I was losing a little weight, I was getting some shape in my legs, and looking pretty good.
Then I did a breast exam. I was horrified to realize I had not one, but two big lumps under my breasts! I was freaked out, to say the least. I also knew that I had a family history of breast cancer. I called my OBGYN, and made an appointment. Fortune would have it, I was due for the yearly "fun" anyway, so I just shined everyone on that I was just 'getting the girls checked'. I figured there was no sense borrowing trouble and freaking everyone else out, 'til I knew what I was dealing with.
After a few nervous days of wondering what the problem was, I finally had my appointment. I nearly bawled at the doctor, saying I had these lumps and I had a family history and omg what was I going to do if it IS cancer... He calmed me down, and very seriously said, maybe we should check what it is that you are feeling first.
So, I pointed out the area. With a stern expression he then did a breast exam. Then he looked confused. Is this the lump? He gently prodded a spot.
Yes.
And you say there is one on the opposite side?
Yes... (Of course, by then I had images of surgery, hair loss, all the lovely things that run through the imagination.)
He stood up, and said, managing to keep a straight face. You haven't maybe been exercising a lot lately, by chance?
Well, yeah. I told him about my class, and he asked me to dress. He also asked if I would tell him about the regular exercises I did in class. I told him, and said that I did them nearly every day out of class, so I could keep up with the other students.
That's when he put a hand on my shoulder, and trying desperately not to laugh, told me that he was quite happy to let me know that what I had was not cancer. It was not even bad. In fact, it made his day to let me know I had proof the exercises were working, because that was new muscle growth under my breasts! He then got out a silicone model of a breast that had "lumps", so I could have a better idea what I was trying to look for. I just figured that any change was bad, up to that point.
He gave me a much better idea of what was good and bad when checking, and seemed pleased when I said he'd made my day. I left with a much better frame of mind, knowledge, and a very good idea of what my doctor's laugh sounded like from behind his office door!
So, please be sure and check things out, but know for what you are checking. I will do my PSA here and say, do the monthly check, and have a check by a doc, too.
You never know when you will have a muscle sneak up on you!
(Oh, and messymimi, if you'd called the posse, they probably would have just handed the phone to my boss, to hand to me! That was most of what my volunteer work was last month!)
Did I hear glutton for punishment?
Yes. What, may I ask, is your point? (grin)
So. I realized it was October, which is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I decided to share a story about it.
It's a story with a happy ending! Really!!
I was in my first year of college where I was out "on my own", in my little apartment, doing my college-y things, and one thing I wanted to do was take karate. There is a family story that when I was a toddler sized carpet rodent, I had used some karate skills, taught to me by my babysitter, to kick another kid off the stage when my Dad was being installed as Sargent of Arms in a lodge meeting.
I guess I never got over it, because I still like karate. Thusly, I wander into my class, and start with running. Lots and lots of running. (And I was given the nickname Duck by one of the others, as I have feet as flat as flat can be, and it sounded like I was slapping the floor, not running...) After what seemed like MILES of running, we would then go on to practice punches. Over and over, and over, and over again, with the teacher pausing by certain students to correct arm placement or stance. After all this we'd usually actually get to spar a bit. (I usually managed to get put with someone who was several belts ahead and at least 10 inches taller than me. But it was fun. Most of the time.)
So, this went on for about 2 months, and I thought nothing of it. I was losing a little weight, I was getting some shape in my legs, and looking pretty good.
Then I did a breast exam. I was horrified to realize I had not one, but two big lumps under my breasts! I was freaked out, to say the least. I also knew that I had a family history of breast cancer. I called my OBGYN, and made an appointment. Fortune would have it, I was due for the yearly "fun" anyway, so I just shined everyone on that I was just 'getting the girls checked'. I figured there was no sense borrowing trouble and freaking everyone else out, 'til I knew what I was dealing with.
After a few nervous days of wondering what the problem was, I finally had my appointment. I nearly bawled at the doctor, saying I had these lumps and I had a family history and omg what was I going to do if it IS cancer... He calmed me down, and very seriously said, maybe we should check what it is that you are feeling first.
So, I pointed out the area. With a stern expression he then did a breast exam. Then he looked confused. Is this the lump? He gently prodded a spot.
Yes.
And you say there is one on the opposite side?
Yes... (Of course, by then I had images of surgery, hair loss, all the lovely things that run through the imagination.)
He stood up, and said, managing to keep a straight face. You haven't maybe been exercising a lot lately, by chance?
Well, yeah. I told him about my class, and he asked me to dress. He also asked if I would tell him about the regular exercises I did in class. I told him, and said that I did them nearly every day out of class, so I could keep up with the other students.
That's when he put a hand on my shoulder, and trying desperately not to laugh, told me that he was quite happy to let me know that what I had was not cancer. It was not even bad. In fact, it made his day to let me know I had proof the exercises were working, because that was new muscle growth under my breasts! He then got out a silicone model of a breast that had "lumps", so I could have a better idea what I was trying to look for. I just figured that any change was bad, up to that point.
He gave me a much better idea of what was good and bad when checking, and seemed pleased when I said he'd made my day. I left with a much better frame of mind, knowledge, and a very good idea of what my doctor's laugh sounded like from behind his office door!
So, please be sure and check things out, but know for what you are checking. I will do my PSA here and say, do the monthly check, and have a check by a doc, too.
You never know when you will have a muscle sneak up on you!
(Oh, and messymimi, if you'd called the posse, they probably would have just handed the phone to my boss, to hand to me! That was most of what my volunteer work was last month!)
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